Lessons revisited....

Do you ever tire of learning the same lesson over and over again? Let me rephrase...
Do you ever tire of having the same lesson presented to you over and over again?

You have now entered FRUSTRATION STATION. To exit this depot you must LEARN the friggin' lesson!!!!

I'm constantly presented the same lesson to learn over and over again... *sigh* And I am willing to share it... maybe YOU can help ME...or maybe I can help YOU.

Either way I hope there is a benefit to what I"m about to write.

I am a Compulsive Overeater:
Definition: Uncontrolled eating or binging, during which I have pressured, frenzied episodes of eating and sometimes can not remember the onset of the episode. I will continue eating past the point of feeling full (thanksgiving full). The Episode is usually followed by guilt and depression.

This disorder is similar in severity to Alcoholism, Drug/Narcotic Addiction, and Sex Addiction. There is NO cure, yes it can kill you (directly or indirectly) there is only constant treatment. And it SUCKS!!!!!!!!!

About the Lesson...

I've been given a "tool" a way to help me beat this addiction, an advantage along with knowledge, education, support, and will power.

Still almost weekly I overeat, to the point where I'm in both physical and emotional pain. Why?
Yes yes because its an addiction... but aside from that. I have all these "tools" and all this knowledge, so again WHY?

Answer: I have been presented with the lesson- The question has been posed- I've answered the question.... I'm addicted, I've been receiving help.... but I'm not being MINDFUL of my response. I'm not being THOUGHTFUL to the lesson presented and my response.

When a person has a huge issue like an incurable disease or disorder... emotional conflicts and complex behavior patterns need to be dealt with. I have received help, guidance and continue to receive this and probably always will (bc there is no cure only maintenance). There is more... there is something I've not tapped into to help me Thoughtfully and Mindfully learn this lesson.

My journey continues... to help me find the untapped items... I blog, journal, meditate, and go to positive resources for assistance. Lesson still left Thoughtfully Unlearned.

S.S.E.

Repo man

So, as I was trying to get my 7hrs of sleep last night. The parking lot, and (since its attached to the parking lot area) my apt were filled with birght flood lights. The Repo Man had arrived to take my neighbors truck. How do you shed a positive light on this...
First thoughts...
How embarrasing
How unfortunate
Finances must be tight
How will they get to work?
...and the list goes on

How do you make lemonaide out of this Lemon (of which the truck was not, it was a nice truck)?

Attitude, Hope, Love, Gratitude

Attitude... dispositions are always choices, (and choices arent always easy to make) and should be tuned into the right channel...which is Gratitude.

Gratitude... is the appreciation of what you've got. SO what you dont have a car, but you've got legs, and those legs can get you to the bus stop, and that bus stop can get you to the terminal to buy a bus pass for the season. Apppreciation and Gratitude... now your Attitude can be tuned.

Hope... oh, imagine a world where you do have what you need... hmmm thats this world! You eat, you have a job, you have your family, you have friends, You have and have and have, and yes you want and want and want, but do you need? Truely...you dont!

Love... There are positive people in your life and there are positive venues and sources to grab hold to. Surround yourself in it, and the other areas will become easier and easier to attain.


S.S.E.

Everyday we're given a chance...

“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.”
Morrie Schwartz

This am I was waking into my office and the lady 15 steps in front of me didnt hold the door, and it made me wonder...what makes one look back, see someone 15 steps behind and not hold the door.

FOr me..if you're behind me, the door will be held open for you. If you're far enough back I will push the handicape button so the door stays open longer.

So if you cant hold the door for someone, how will you let something like love in your life? Seems to me if a simple task like courtesy is skipped over then so much more can be skipped.

dream....

"Most people who fail in their dreams fail not from lack of ability, but from lack of commitment"

The little engine should have said, I know I can, I know I can.

instead of giving my self reasons why I can't, I give myself reasons why I can.

work hard!!!

"remember- the "free" cheese is in a mousetrap" Anonymous

dont steal my sunshine

I've been working with the most difficult type of person. The one that talks behind everyones back, and you want to ignore it, but it stings so bad you want to also confront her. At work I call her Firestarter, because she always instigates. She brings smoke, and soot to every situation. She is the worst kind of overcast day...

I have a few days away from her due to a two day class and a weekend, lets see how I feel on Monday.


Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. ~Anthony J. D'Angelo

flutter

"Many things will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart... pursue those." Anonymous


SSE

Its been a while

I guess...

"if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all" covers why I havent been here...

But that is all changing.

Life is good, I just lost my gratitude for a while.

Gratitude is the best Attitude!!!

SSE

Choices

Choices have a lot to do with what you think of yourself...

I started with that sentence because I'm weighing some things out.

I guess sometimes when you make a choice, just a daily decision, to say... do the dishes. You can plainly see the advantages to this.
1. clean dishes next time you need to use them
2. no stench coming from the sink
3. easier to wash now when the food will come off easily
4. no roaches!

When it comes to important matters, say of the heart. This decision is a bit more thought out... well for some of us it is.

She has so many great qualities and one really, really bad one. I don't think I can compromise.

"Our Choices in Life are made according to our sense of our own worth."
Kaylan Pickford

SSE

Push positive thoughts forward

There are times when life is so unbelievably hard. We feel like we must complain, we must shout from the hightest peak that this is too tough.

When we have those times, this is the best time to take stock. Get out your pen and paper and write down an inventory of what you have. Shout that out from the highest peak, and you get perspective.

Please do not think that I"m saying forget about what you have not, what I'm sayiing is that if you remember what you have, you can get what you do not have. You'll realize that you came into what you have by positive situations. Push a positive thought forward about what you are complaining about, and it will work itself out.

SSE

Choices

“Anything you desire, you deserve. Stop making excuses and move toward your dream… Victims don’t become victors And you get to chose which you will be.” Will Bowen


Dont be insulted by the lines above. Take action! Control your life! Many bad things happen to us, some of the things that happen to us are so awful that they cant be made up. You survived that trial, be proud of yourself. Don't take on the victim role any longer. Step outside of it and obtain what you desire...becaues you deserve it.

Be well

SSE

Goals and acheiving results

"The reason most people never reach their goals is that they don’t define them, or ever seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them."
Denis Watley

I made my first weight loss goal...and didnt even realize it.

Its important that we set goals and recognize the results. Even if you're a foot away from perfect, dont discount the inches.

positive by choice

Today is a scary day for me. I have a dr.'s appoint to check in on a bout of cancer I had a couple years ago. I hope all is well.

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.” Herm Albright'

this cracks me up b/c this is so me! lol

SSE

Goals

I am very very close to reaching a life goal of mine. THis one is about weight loss

How do I stay focused? How do I congratulate myself without endulging in what caused me to gain weight?

1. make yourself accountable (ask for help)
2. Go public, shout it to the rafters (because then people will check in with you)
3. Set reminders (my phone has a 445 reminder to get up and go to the gym)
4. remember to reward yourself
5. Remind yourself that its about the journey, the end result is not the victory, its what you've learned.


"Only as high as I reach can I grow, only as far as I seek can I go, only as deep as I look can I see, only as much as I dream can I be."
Karen Ravn

Ending on a high note.... (sing it fat lady)

Thursday rocked. I was asked about taking on another project (same sort of thing), and I agreed, heck yea. Because I got kudos for mine. Yay. I was so happy.

Had an opportunity to work with someone I had a hard time connecting with and found out we're aligned.

Great food, great work outs, great week!

I'm trusted, loved, appreciated, a part of something bigger than myself and I'm happy in it.

I got back to work today and found my book at my desk, "A Complaint Free World" my manager asked me to let him know how it was b/c it may become one of our reads of the year. I also found a huge bag of Chicago Bears gear that I bought it finally came today too!

Tonight is the ballet and I'm stoked, I have a reason to dress up, and I've been hitting the gym so hard that I have a reason not to wear a girddle! :)

LEMONAIDE!!!

"Keep your mind on the things you want and off the things you don't want."Hannah Whitall Smith

The lemon before the lemonaide!

So this week has already been a tough one for me...

Sunday:
I found out I was a victim of identity theft
Monday:
I got a suprise call from my ex's current girlfriend who was very upset and had questions for me.
I got my surgery bill that I wasnt expecting
Tuesday:
Found out I may be solo on a large project and presentation for work due Thursday.


These items are listed for my reference. They may not sound like stressers for you, but when I read them I know how I felt when they occured and some caused a bit of panic.

Sometimes things can go right only by first going very wrong. -Edward Tenner

Basically, I want to say... I will make it through these things, its not the end of the world and besides between all these things occuring..there were some true positives.

Sunday:
I bought a Calvin Klien suit that fits me like a glove for the first time. I will have a designer label
Had breakfast with a friend
Monday:
Finished half of the project due on Thursday
Worked out with trainer at my new gym, and learned a lot
A friend came by and brought me some found items. Shelves for my loves (plants).
Made myself a healthy and delish dinner
Got a good nights sleep
Tuesday:
I'm determined to finish the project today, and give myself a good rest on Wed to prepare for presentation on Thursday.

It takes 21 days to form a habit!

I will write more later.


"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit."-Aristotle

I'm gonna read a book

Its been a while...
I'm not gonna lie. I dont really read.

My book of choice. "A Complaint free WOrld" My friend whom I will call HawkGirl, suggested it a while back, and I just hadnt purchased it yet. I dont know what I was waiting for. But now is the time I guess. I placed the order for the book today I should have it next week!

SOme of the twitter posts for this book, and organization read like this...


"Do you ever noticed why good things don’t happen when you’re in a bad mood?"

" A positive attitude recognizes the negative aspects of a situation, but chooses to focus instead on the hope and opportunity available"

"Focus on what people do right. If offering criticism, do so in a positive way and provide three times as much praise as criticism"

someone said to me.

"Maybe someday, you'll accept ... help with getting what you need." ** most recent ex.

I'm thinking about this right now. I'll make comments later.

LATER>>>

So I have had a chance to think about this and talk it out with my friend K.B. Its very true. I do not let others help me... well not often.

Why? Well I think tis because I have managed to do it all for myself. Its 2nd nature... so when I'm in a relationship I must just handle it...

Will you try to let others help? Sure, I just have to keep this in the forefront of my mind... and let anyone interested in a relationship with me know... I can be very gungho.

This was insight that I needed. I really, honestly, truely did not know that I did this...and I can see how it can be so. I have not had many relationships and the ones I've had have been very short, all under 7 months. Not by choice, they were short simply because they couldnt play out any longer..differences, issues, whathave you. I have always just done things... never expected help, or thought that anyone would want to help. I guess things will be different now.

Adieu.

SSE

Motivation...where are you??

So lately, I've really had the desire to hit the gym, work on my gut, butt, and whutever else. lol And thought I have had the desire, my motivation to get there is lacking. You'd think that this spare motorcycle tire around my midsection would move me..but alas...NO.
I have taken it easier on myself and thought ok, what will you do? YOu will go shopping, you will go dancing, you will clean the apt. So do those things. I did those things, and still had time left over..did I got to the gym? NOPE! Goodness Secret Self Esteem, what is up with that? lol

I found this quote below... maybe its a source of motivation for me. It moved me, but not out the door and around the corner to the gym. *sigh* I have hope that something will move me.

"Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you"
Ralph Waldo Emerson

I get by with a little help from my friends

"With true friends...even water drunk together is sweet enough." Chinese Proverb
It has never suprised me that when I talk to a friend or spend time with a friend it feels great, its like being recharged, fuel for life basically.

I honestly would not stir a friend wrong, well not purposefully. I open my big mouth (often) and advise falls out. Its just how I am. I want everyone I know to live their life positively. To let go of the pain and chase after the joy.

Spend some time with a friend this weekend (especially your single ones) and let them know how sweet life is when they're in your life.

SSE

Today is the beggining of my new life

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4zWBHFCmXM

Today (whether today be yesterday, tomorrow, or three years from now) is always the beggining of your new life... choices make the difference.

So I've pretty much always had a positive voice, but sometimes I have times of doubt, and times where I dont see clearly. I'm only human.

My friend MDB gave me a link. Its above..and its helpful.

Have a wonderful friday everyone. I know I will.

SSE

me and my big mouth

"Well done is better than well said" Ben Franklin

What can YOU do for YOU?

Last night was a hard night for me. I think a combination of recent awful events, awful events to come, other issues and hormones just drug me down into a funk. My heart was full of pain and confusion. I took that and turned my thoughts into positive ones.

I thought to myself, what can I bring into my life to make help take this weight off of me. I went out with friends, I laughed, I made a new connection. The kind of connection that I think will be a great influence on my goals this year. I took a long bath and reflected, and when I thought of something negative I thought of two things positive to offset it. Eventually the water cooled down and I got out...but my thoughts were all positive ones. (some people call this praying)

When I woke up this morning it was easy, My work time was not painful. I made more connections with great friends who haven't been consistent in correspondence, I had some rough spots in between, but i was able to take them in stride and do what needed to be done. That process is on going, and it doesn't seem like a big issue anymore.




"If we all did the things we are capable of,we would astound ourselves."Thomas Edison

Own your thoughts, actions and eventually your own life!

"When you have control over your thoughts, you have control over your life" Remez Sasson

Many people find that when they are depressed, anxious, or having some emotional issues, they go into auto pilot. This means just doing it what they can to get through the day, going through the motions. Well I cant say that there is anything wrong with this for a temperary means of coping, but in the long run, please do something to get back to yourself.

THe above quote is so true... When you get a grip on your thought, when you take responsibility for not only yourself but your thoughts and where the lead to. You will control your life.

Positive thoughts yeild positive actions which ultimately grant you positive results.

Be well everyone!

SSE

Don't take love for granted

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."
~Lao Tzu~

This is not a suprising quote coming from me. Everyone knows I have a tight knit family. We arent in eachothers business but we are always available for eachother.

I'm not the most fortunate in romantic love but love itself I have in abundance! Its an important part of my life and I think that if everyone can appreciate what they have been given and love can only be given... then they would gain more in this life.

Turn to the one you love, Husband, Mom, Wife, Dad, Brother, Sister, Grandma, Boyfriend, whomever. Please let them know...

"Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success." - Dr. Joyce Brothers

Mind Power can move (what seems like) mountains. Just by thinking positive, you give yourself the means to put positive thought into positive action which will give you a positive result.

If you want success, tell yourself you are a success (not like Kanye West, don't be obnoxious *wink*), and the next thing to come would be actions to make you a success, "What do you successful people do?" Use those behaviors and boost yourself into a light where you are successful. Apply your will, and perseverance and you've got it.

Its not an overnight process, b/c envisioning yourself as a success doesn't happen over night either. Try it and you'll see, it works!

Giving, and being greatful that you can give

This is something that we all know...but is never at the forefront of our lives... and it should be.

So we know that its "always better to give than to receive", right? Maybe we don't.

Let me give you an example. I have had stress, a recent break up, a bad performance at work (which shook me), health issues, recent surgery, family is experiencing health issues, a car accident, health issues of my own, etc etc and so on and so forth. I can focus on all the bad things, or I can move them into a positive light so that they can improve.

What is the best way to propel your life into positive light? You guessed it. Give! Its so simple.

Give a compliment, give a hug, take a moment, let someone cut in line, give your dessert that you packed special just for yourself to someone who forgot their lunch, all that good easy stuff we can but don't do everyday. Propel your life into a positive light.

Then let yourself feel good about it. Because you are capable, or because you have the means is not enough, let yourself know, and tell yourself... "You did something good, you made a difference". Own it.. (like you should own all of your actions).

“If you have much, give of your wealth; If you have little, give of your heart" Arab Proverb

Celebrate a life lived Positively and with more love than we are dealt

'Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?' Martin Luther King, Jr.

just a quote this weekend. To all.. be well!

'In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years'-- Abraham Lincoln

"Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight" Japanese Proverb

I have some friends, who have had a hard time lately. These things did not happen to one person, but one person went through more than one of these things. I hope that was clear.

Financial hardship, got behind on payments
House burglarized and items stolen
Car repo
Laid off of job
A bad break up, lost hope and hates being alone
Life altering health issues (multiple)
Emergency Surgery, loss of work time, no vacation time or sick time
Death of spouse

So...what do you do when your life is like this. Just pick two..any two... At least two of these things affected people I know and care about with in a month. How awful right? Yes, but guess what they're still standing, moving forward and persevering. Its at the worst of times that we shine through with our bests. As long as you wake up and start a new day, its a start, and if you wake up and start a new day with a choice (positivity), its a good day.

Last night I spent some time with a friend while she waited for her husband to come out of emergency surgery. She was at the ER with him all day, and they finally figured out what the issue was. She was by herself and she didn't ask anyone to come because she knew where she wanted to be. I didn't know she was by herself, until I walked in. I didn't care if she had a million friends waiting with her, I was going to give her my support as well. That momentum grew, another friend showed up, after that family showed up. If you put it out there... it builds!

So like the proverb says. Fall Seven Times, Stand Up Eight, its worth it!

SSE

If you squint you can see the weekend

That was the first thing I heard when I woke up this morning. I usually hop out of bed, try not to trip over the cat, and head for the living room to turn the tv on for the weather. The anchor man said " If you squint you can see the weekend" I thought it was cute. I took it with me all day, actually got to use it once.

Today we all were prepared for the disapointment from our manager. In my position there are five others, and we have been not the best at one particular task. Some of us accepted the fact and want to learn. Others refuse the fact and look for ways out of it. So we knew our Manager was going to hammer it home.. for the last time! 4 hrs later our meeting ended. The stress cloud hovered over my unit. At one moment there was a stern and loud request for one of us to go into my managers office. I stayed in my cube and was glad it wasnt me. I already feel like I am low on the totem pole. I've been working overtime (not paid b/c I'm salaried) just to understand what is going on sometimes.

After work, and after I was there from 7am to 515pm. I decided it was timeto do something nice and positive. One of my friends has a birthday this Saturday, and I wanted to find her a gift. $112 later... I left with 8 sweaters, a giftcard, a new breifcase, jeans and sweatpants for my sis in law. lol I must say...I feel much better, I think I will sleep well tonight. Plus Tomorrow is jeans day and I get to put on one of my new sweaters!

Positive note: "You are the only person on earth who can use your ability.” Zig Ziglar

This year is about the above quote.

PS. Rest in Peace Teddy Pendergrass

In the Beginning

This is just a place for me to spew positive thought and to dispose of the negative.

I will talk about my life, hopes, irratations, family, dreams, etc.

Most will end with a positive thought on how to refocus, others may end in a question mark...thats where you come in. How do I see through that issue, or how do I look another direction.

Anyway... this is a challanging and new period of my life...so there should be much to talk about.

Stay tuned.

Be Well!